Chief of Defence Staff & Rick Mercer

We have welcomed a number of distinguished guests to OTTAWA this evening, including Canada’s Chief of Defence Staff and Rick Mercer and Mary Walsh from This Hour Has 22 Minutes. The Captain announced this morning, over the sounds of showers and teeth brushing, that we would be treated to the comedy stylings of Canada’s much loved comedians and General Hillier, Canada’s Chief of Defence Staff, as well as a number of media personnel. They will be staying with us, laughing with us, and eating with us until tomorrow afternoon. The Junior Ranks (that’s me) are lucky enough to be hosting Rick Mercer in our Mess tonight… hopefully he’ll be able to make us all laugh – cause we sure could use it! Over dinner the Captain, declared our route home. We have been waiting since we slipped the lines in Esquimalt back in September to find out our route of return… But when the Captain spoke those ominous words, the silence was almost deafening. We will be returning the way we came, in that we will be taking the Pacific Route home. However, we will not be going to the same ports. Instead we will be stopping in Malaysia, Hong Kong, Tokyo, Dutch Harbor, and then Victoria. The moment the Captain said we were going up to Japan, I knew something wasn’t quite right. “Dutch Harbor” rang some bells, but I couldn’t quite recall where I had heard that name before… until someone piped up with the missing piece of that turbulent puzzle, “You know, where they film that TV show, ‘World’s Deadliest Catch.’” If you haven’t heard of this show, it is a reality program giving viewers “an inside look at the forty-foot waves, freezing temperatures and 700 pound king crab pots of one of the world's deadliest jobs.” I don’t think I have to elaborate much more as to the extent of my terror. I am trying hard not to let the impending doom of the Bering Sea dampen my spirits towards the ports to come – but COME ON!! The only positives that I have managed to muster are A) At least I will be able to claim I’ve sailed it all, with sea states as dangerous as this, B) I will now know what it is like to be on IV, and C) This will be one hell of a weight loss program, just in time for my homecoming. The only comfort has been double edged. I am not alone in my fears, as many of my bosses are getting rather nervous about this “change of plans” too… the only trouble is, if we are all sick, who will take care of us?? Time for the healing powers of comedy…